Relaxed Confidence

Day 1 - Sheep Ranch Golf Course, Bandon Dunes, OR

It was day one of a 5-day golf trip at one of my bucket-list locations, Bandon Dunes. A majestic Scottish-style 6-course resort on the coast of southern Oregon. I was giddy with excitement as I stood on the driving range soaking in the environment. This was going to be the golf trip of a lifetime!

I made my first practice shot on the range – shank. Another shot – topper. Another – slice. One shot after the other went terribly wrong. I had absolutely no feel for my swing. My whole body was tight as I continued to press. I tried to force the perfect shot. It only got worse. Panic set in.

There I was, starting a dream 5-day golf trip with a group of guys who were good golfers, and I felt like I was playing golf for the first time in my life. This was going to be a long and depressing trip.

The next morning, before our first round, I went back to the dreaded driving range, yet with a different mindset. I reflected on what has worked for me in the past in sports and in business -  relaxed confidence. This time at the range, I removed the prior “noise” out of my mind and focused on only two things – head down, and relaxed swing. All swing thoughts were out of my head except for those two, and it worked. I hit some of the furthest, straightest shots in my golf career. The shanks were gone!

I marvel at how well this mindset adjustment can not only work in sports, but also in the business world. Too often I hear of professionals pressing others’ agendas, overanalyzing business communications, or giving up prematurely on relationships. Whatever situation you face, you can either tense up and make things worse for yourself and those around you, or you can choose to take a step back, breathe, and move forward with relaxed confidence.

There is a fine line between having a sense of urgency and pushing something too hard. On the one hand, you need to have a level of urgency, discipline, and focus to grow a business. On the other hand, poise, patience, and confidence will allow the relationships and opportunities time to mature and bear fruit more naturally.

I am sure that my biggest challenge with golf stems from being too tight. My grip is too tight. My body is too tight, and I swing too hard. When I loosen the grip and relax the body, my game improves dramatically.

I believe that business professionals are mentally too tight when trying to grow their business.  They overthink what to say or write in their BD communications. They get nervous with certain client meetings or pitches. They focus too much on the revenue and not enough on the process. They second guess themselves on starting a new initiative. The list goes on.

Let’s make it a point to focus more on relaxed confidence. Whether it is for your business or your personal life, it is amazing what can happen when you breathe and relax.

My golf game still has a long way to go, yet the recent Bandon Dunes trip was a breakthrough for me. Learning to keep the body loose, not dwell on the last bad shot or hole, and focus on enjoying the moment, shifted a potential nightmare trip into one of the better golf trips I have taken.